Tuesday sounds like a perfect day to take over the world! Jack Canfield, continues talking about fear in today’s lesson. Psychologists define fear as a fantasized experience appearing real, which I truly believe is something that runs rampant in our society today. This can be seen in men and women who have many talents and abilities; they continue to miss out on opportunities in life because they are afraid of the outcomes. Many of those opportunities lie in their current situation, their current job, their personal life, etc.
To help you better understand how you bring unfounded fear into your life, make a list of the things you are afraid to do. Remember, this list is not a list of things you are afraid of, but a list of things you are afraid to do. Take “I am afraid of spiders” for example, instead of what you are afraid of, make your list something like this— “I am afraid of picking up spiders.” Your list could consist of things similar to the following:
- I am afraid to ask (insert name here) out on a date.
- I am afraid to go skydiving.
- I am afraid to fix my relationship with my brother/sister.
- I am afraid to delegate any part of my job to others.
After you have made a list of your fears, go back and restate each fear using the following format—I want to _______________, but I scare myself by imagining _______________. I.e. I want to ask Janet out on a date, but I scare myself by imagining her response would be no, and I would embarrass myself if I do so. All fear is created by imagining some negative outcome in the future.
Fear is always created in your own mind.
How then, do you get rid of it? One way is to take what scares you and what you are imagining in that situation, and replace it with the positive opposite. I.e. I am going to ask Janet out on a date because I know she will say yes, and I know we will have a great time. Many times, facing your fears literally comes down to changing the thoughts, which are running through your mind, from negative to positive.
Canfield, gives an example of how a lady who was flying with him was able to change her fear into something positive. She was clenching the chair armrests so hard that her knuckles turned white. He asked her if she was nervous and she responded in the affirmative. He began to tell her to close her eyes and to tell him what she was imagining.
She began to tell him that she kept thinking that they would not get off the runway, and would crash. Canfield then asked her where she was headed, she responded she was on her way to meet her grandkids at Disneyworld. He then told her to imagine herself riding her favorite ride, to imagine the music that was playing, and to imagine her grandkids laughing. Instantly, her hands loosened from the chair armrests, she started breathing much slower, and her state of fear turned into a state of calmness.
Just like this woman was scared, you must recognize your fears and embrace them. As we have talked about multiple times in this blog, life is too short to be sacred. Life is too short to live in fear when you can live in faith. Life is too short to cut yourself short because you are worried about the outcome. Go all in! What the freak do you have to lose? Nobody is telling you that everything you do is going to work out perfectly, but what I am telling you is, you will be so much further ahead than when you got started. This is what life is all about, progress!
Man of progression, Cram.